Sapucaia Roca

The First Meeting...Mostly
LIfe is tough as a drunk tank regular

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“The Amazing” Rando (Michael), of Rando’s Restorative Relixer, saved Aric Mane (Gerbs) from death. He was the “pathetic” sell as a kid. Now, they’ve been together 6 years. Aric is now about 18, and Rando’s muscle. Rando is a flim flam con man, with a heart of gold. Aric is the only other one that knows about the ingredients to the miracle tonic. They have a surrogate father son deal. Aric is not a talker, not real bright either. “Don’t punch down.” He only skims from the well to do. They’ll rig a contest to fight the strong man, and grift from the locals. A private eye with a client is following the trail of their broken hearts and rubber checks. Rando has a long lost love, whose father wasn’t keen on their romance. “She smelled nice like anise, although a bit dull.”

Rando, Aric, and the private eye all wake up in jail together. The P.I. is both tsk-tsking Rando for his tonic, and giving kudos to his business acumen. They are discussing what the charges might be. The cell is an old wooden shack, set into the ground are thick iron bars with a tiny window, letting in a thin shaft of light. The light strikes their eyes, waking them up. They have everything on them, weapons and all. Outside the window, a hungover Rando, sees a field of grass and trees in full green bloom. The last he remembers, they set up a card game in the bar, making friends, things going well. There was an elf, who thought what they were doing was morally reprehensible. After that, he remembers a lot of drink, a lot, a lot, and maybe a walk. He negotiated a tonic for beer situation, adding to the inebriation. There was a guitar, and singing. Aric recounts, “I don’t usually drink, but I did.” Rando’s marked cards are not in their

The elf starts recounting, “The bar, Rando talking about his tonic, beer…” Nectar is mildly hallucinogenic, euphoric. Elf, “Are we in the drunk tank?!” Yes. Yes, they are. They hear spurred boot steps from down the hall. Aric sits on the blankets and straw. Dusting himself off, Rando calls, “Good morning” and a fancy man calls, “good afternoon.” He has a nicer rapier than the elf, and is well dressed, with a giant belt buckle. He opens the cell. The elf, Illis’kar (Illy) introduces herself and asks the stranger his name. Mssr Dobrão is rebuffed by their lack of reaction. He keeps a mean tom cat in the jail. All black with fierce eyes, a dragon’s mouth, which flicks a long snake-like tongue at the three. Dobrão offers them a shots, which will “get them past the jail cat.” The boys drink, and Illy tries to stealth avoid the shot. She “spilled” it, and asks for another.

Leaving jail, there is a colorful little town with stone and clay houses. Not a remnant of the empire, everything curves and flows. All the streets are winding. The climate is hot, humid, and bright. They hear the lonely notes of a flute, several blocks away.

Thava, a dragonborn, monk/sailor and Yossarian, a halfling – first generation freed slave, sorcerer/entertainer come to town by boat. They may have met on the boat to town, but find themselves drinking at the bar where the drunk tank three made poor decisions.

Tyvia Kulavanth is a successful entrepreneur, who tires of living vicariously through the tales of her clientele. Leaving the house in the care of her second, she seeks adventure. Perhaps to return, someday, after her wanderlust is sated. Grillo, the village town with the blackout bar, is but one stop on her world tour.
The relic of Chrimeria, a crescent shaped treasure of spun gold with jewels, legend has it this is how to get into the ancient mountain worlds. Stolen by the unseelie. Proud totem of the village of Grillo. Illy is on the trail for her client, and she goes after the relic in order to track the target. Aric and Rando help the PI get through the forest to the to the ruin. Tyvia, Illy, Aric, Rando, and Thava all go to the ruins together. Tyvia takes a liking to Thava, based on them both being of unusual race. Aric has no qualm with the ladies joining the drunk-tank-three.

Suddenly, the six of us, find ourselves in a dark room, of an ancient ruin, with slit windows at the ceiling height. Something is pounding on a large wooden door. A massive, muscular thing is splintering it with each strike. Chased into the room by goblin unseelie, who were on the trail of the halfling, Yossarian. There is a table and several wardrobes in the room, and darkness beyond. Thava has taken a look at some papers. Illy is looking for passages and along walls, with the aid of Rando. They find an alcove, with a sliver of light at the base of the wall. When Rando touches the stones, they are slimy and malleable. The look much newer. He pushes through, and there is a tingling sensation. He pokes at it with his rapier. A thin trickle of liquid pours out. It is bloodlike. That brick falls to the ground with a splat, releasing more bloodlike liquid, and the wall around it begins to shudder.

Yossarian also begins to examine the papers, learning that the author of the papers was properly educated, maybe arcane, no way to tell. Aric is leaning on the splintering door, and Thava is helping with his plan to stab out of the splinters into the goblins. He stabs through the door and pulls it back through, leaving a hole in the door, and pained goblin(s) on the other side. She moves to spit acid through the hole, to buy some more time. The pods that she shoots, hit both goblins and the door. Those goblins? Oh, no, that’s an ogre.

To be continued… Aric means to wrastle an ogre.

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Deal With Your Fucking Goblins
How not to wrassle an ogre

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The ogre steps in through the hole in the door, first looking down at his own wound. Then lays bloodshot eyes on Aric, says hello solemnly, and hits him with a sapling in the head. It is bleeding terribly, and he takes 11 points of damage. The ogre tells him now they’re even.

Yossarian sends 3 magic missiles at the ogre, for basically a papercut’s worth of damage. One of them hits in his wound, and he begins to scan the room. Illy stabs the wall again, and they notice the wall keening. Rando begins singing a song about how powerful Aric is, and is somehow also an ad for Restorative Relixer. Aric wants to then grab the ogre, from inside his chest wound, with the aided power of Bardic Inspiration from Rando. Aric gets the Ogre in a choke hold, immobilized. Aric begins to choke the ogre, and by kicking the instep he hears something crack. Two goblins come up, and one – flipping a knife – asks why he’s even here, before stabbing at Aric. It misses! Aric looks over at Yossarian and says, “Deal with your fucking goblins.” The stabby goblin moves away, into the shadows. Thava attacks the ogre, as does Tyvia. The ogre slams Aric into the wall, dropping him to zero hit points, blacked out onto the floor. Yossarian backed up and threw fire at the ogre, the ogre ducked, and it went to shadowy figures beyond. Aric narrowly escapes his first death saving throw.

Illystabs into the jelly like wall. It is shuddering, in the little gaps when it moves, a passageway beyond may be seen. The whole jelly wall is imploding upon itself. A female all covered in dust is all that is left from the wall. She, with bloodshot eyes, gets up and scampers down the hall.

Rando tries to make the ogre believe that there are out-of-control flames next to and behind the ogre. The ogre looks behind him, and he is alarmed. Thava feels a hand on her back, and tries slipping a dagger into her. She spins, pushing back the goblin. The goblins share a glance, and the second throws a dagger into her throat for 10 points of damage. She dropped to 0, coughing up some acid pellets. She fails her first death saving throw.

In the alcove, there is a figure in chains. He remembers nothing but a lot of booze and a beautiful woman. He can’t quite remember her race, or much of what happened. Lugash.

Tyvia does not break her gaze on the goblins, knife flipping, and considering her. While she caresses Thava for 6 HP of Sexual Healing (Lay on Hands).

Lugash roars, and shakes the chains he’s bound by. He’s just hung over and angry. Yelling at Illy, “Release me!” in a thick Russian accent.

The ogre decided he did not want to hit Tyvia, and sits down. Yossarian asks if he may take that as unconditional surrender. The goblins reply, “We are dropping you like flies. Why would we surrender?” Yossarian throws fire at the goblin, and starts screaming… until it stops. “What say you now?!” says Yossarian, defiantly. The Ogre replies, “Well then,” and moves closer to Yossarian.

Illy is inspecting the chains on Lugash, and begins to pick the locks. They pop easily, and she steps back. The metal is not iron, they are brass. Rando calls to ask what is going on in there. Illy replies that there is another dragonborn. Rando has an exchange with the ogre, and ends up moving to stab the ogre with his rapier. This was all brushed off as the ogre continues to stomp to Yossarian.

Zeto has been murdered, and his goblin friend is most upset. Rando tells him why we’re here. This goblin is motioning things forward through the fire. Moro, the ogre, negotiates with Rando, and the flames are quieted in effort to calm Moro. Thava is debating between her need to nibble or drag the fallen Aric away. She drags him from the goblins, and Tyvia follows to heal Aric with her Sexual Healing.

A golden dragonborn, Lugash, with a horny humanoid face, leathery loincloth, and fine silver jewelry stalks to Moro the ogre. The dragonborn notice each other on his way, he notices she is injured, walked up to the ogre and breathes fire into his face. Moro stumbles and takes 4 damage. Rando calls out that the fire is an illusion. The ogre instinctively swings his club at Lugash, “It feels real!” Inflicting 7 points of damage with his tree branch. Lugash returns with Hellish Rebuke, engulfing the ogre in fire, confusing the ogre and making him uncomfortable. Thava takes her attack of opportunity on the ogre, and moves to bite him. Snapping at him and ducking under the club. Rando then takes his attack of opportunity, missing, the rapier flies off into the darkness, and Rando is knocked on his ass. Aric goes to kick the ogre, but he’s prone and Rando falls on him.

Yossarian fails his death saving throw. Aric sits upright. Illy slinks back to the corridor, trying to get the jump on the remaining (visible) goblin. She fails at being sneaky, and all around see where she’s going. She moves to intimidate the goblin, blade to his throat, “Call off the reinforcements!” He does, “Stop, she’s going to kill me. Just like they killed Zeto.”

Rando begins telling everyone to calm down. “What we need is some reason, so we understand why everyone is here.” The ogre wants to know if the blade is real, or like the fire. Tyvia goes to heal Yossarian with Sexual Healing.

Lugash gets uppity while the healing is happening, with the ogre. Rando jumps in, and uses Make Friends on Lugash. Lugash asks the ogre if he were the one to chain him. The ogre is confused by the nature of reality, though he denies it. “This is the territory of the unseelie court of the goblin kings. How are we to come to an understanding?” says the goblin. Illy begins to lecture him on the rules of engagement, and responded to force with force. (Orcs = Goblins, fey ancesestors. Any fey of unseelie court may refer to themselves as goblins, and goblins may refer to themselves as elves. Contracts may or may not be honored.) The goblin, Anau, shakes Rando’s hand on the agreement to go the separate ways with no malice.

Lugash wants to know why he was captured here. They all are trying to convince Anau that the Relixer is something he’ll want to exchange for the information we seek. Thava spits a single acid ball on Anau’s shoes. Lugash, prince of clan stroganoff, was here taking up with the stone nymph.

Yossarian was telling some terribly offensive jokes in his jestering to the goblins. He suspects this is why they chased him, and he chased us. He’s very defensive about his responsibility in this whole matter. We take an hour’s rest and talk out or motivations. There is an invisible servant – Kriv – dispatched by Lugash to massage (hit on) Thava.

The hall heads up on an incline in these ruins. There is wreckage around the exterior of the structure we’re in now. The angle and the light make it difficult to see what is at the end of the corridor. Looking for traps and the unusual as we go through, after the stone nymph. The passage shows no signs of weak points (traps) and the path is well traveled. At the end of the tunnel, it opens up into a room. The room is crooked, paving stones are crude and one side is much higher than the other. There are lots of little stone structures laying about the room, some broken, some whole. The far wall is curved, and each side goes to meet that wall. High on a chain there is a raised fire pit, lighting the room with glowing coals (no flame). The stone is light colored, and the top reflects the light well across the room. The room is scattered with some stone benches. The structure predates current civilization, and the writings are Kron (human). “strength, mighty, glorious” The two tunnels leading out, are dark and placed symmetrically. The left has the most recent use, and the right has been more heavily traveled overall. The nymph appears to have used the left path.

Air starts to hit our face as the tunnel goes downward slope. We find ourselves in a field, at night. We can smell the salt air of the ocean, and the stars are out on this clear night. Thava needs to feed, but cannot find anything to snack on. Lugash sends Kriv to find her a snack, but since he can’t actually attack, he brings back already dead woodland critters. Kriv sighs each time he’s sent on a task. He doesn’t much like lizards or … anything.

As Illy tries to find her stone nymph, she comes across a terrible smell. Floating to Illy, posed with her rapier, is a bundle of rodents. “You will be hungry no longer, my love. Your dinner is on its way.” Illy is disgusted, as the rodents float passed her. They all fall at Thava’s feet, and are well on the way to or through decomposition. Thava kicks the pile, and looks as disgusted as Illy. “Kriv, you son of bitch,” Lugosh claps Kriv away.

Illy looks around for boulders, and Rando seeks magic. Illy sits infront of the boulder the boys try to lift. Lugosh tried to sweet talk the boulder, but failing that, he hits the boulder with Eldrich Blast.

Vines grow around us, the ground reaches up. Rando and Tyvia escape and roll away. Stony vines grab the others.

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When one of us dies in this manner, it is customary for a service to be performed
Until he took an arrow in the knee...

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Lugosh and Thava are pulled up into the trees by the vines. (The players are not here for this session.) Rando has an epiphany about the stony vines; the land is infused with magic. The stony vines are not naturally here, but they are magically so. Because of the stone aspect of the vines, it is probable that there is an outside force at work.

Aric begins to wrench himself out of the stony vines, before they begin to harden around him. Tyvia stares in wonderment, unable to help any of her comrades. Yossarian tries to slither out of the vines, and they begin to wrap further around him. He tries to break free, and that proves more effective. “Poof-Cha!” he says in excitement. Illy tries to get her blade free, but cannot due to the way the vines pull on her. Fighting the vines with pure strength gets her free.

Rando notices off to the west, a floating, very bright light, shining in all directions. He goes wide around to get a better look at the light, and the view stays the same from all angles. Aric picks up a rock to hit other rocks with, if need be. He then talks to Rando about what he sees. Rando imparts to Aric his knowledge of the light.

Yossarian recognizes this as an unseelie spell. Rando then tells Yossarian about where he thinks the spell caster is. Illy sees a beautiful woman, in the foliage, watching all of us – especially Rando and Tyvia. Illy calls to whom she assumes is a stone nymph, “ho there! we mean no harm. we’re just here to talk.”

The woman has a gray cast to her, and the hair is silver in a gorgeous way – not aged. Rando introduces himself, asking if she is the beautiful creature we encountered in the ruin. She says she doesn’t recall any other beautiful creatures there, so she must be. Tyvia is totally insulted. Eventually, she says Tyvia and Rando may stay. She desires song, and is flighty about anything else he asks. Rando begins to entertain, and gains advantage.

The halfling asks the stone nymph for his friend back, and she asks how he likes not working. He says that his work is with the Drangonborn female in the trees. “You don’t want to work for me?” she asks. He is charmed by her, and starts telling her jokes. Trying to back away proves difficult. She asks him to fetch the drift globe, so we may have a better look around.

In the fray of the halfling and bardic hijinks, Illy attempts to stealthily flank the stone nymph. Yossarian loses sight of the elf, as does Rando, and have no concern since they are charmed. Aric and I notice she’s slinking in the shadows. Aric requests a tune from Rando about waterfalls. It is painful. Several rocks open their eyes, and start dancing to the terrible music. Aric drops his rock and it cracks. Blood rolls out and it twitches. Aric asks the stone nymph if the rock is okay. She says he is dead, and you’ll have to perform a service. He sings Oh Danny Boy. He takes out a hanky to lay over him, and the stone nymph stop him from touching him. The other rocks are depressed over the loss of their friend. “When one of us dies in this manner, it is customary for a service to be performed.”

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The stone nymph instructs Yossarian to place the globe just so. She carves into a rock, and folds it into a stone letter. She hands it to Aric to deliver to Lorca in the city of Grillo. Illy starts climbing a tree to free the dragonborn. A rose thorn the size of a palm juts out on her next hand hold, to stop her climb. She tries to grab the thorn as it appears from the bark of the tree. Her hand passes through it, and it disappears. She assumes it is an illusion, and moves to keep climbing. Illy sees a creature in the tree adjacent which looks like a giant butterfly, looking at Illy, while making hand gestures. She continues her climb, keeping the butterfly in her periphery. It disappears, and tiny claw marks appear in the branches, which bow as if a weight is on it.

Aric tries to look for the dragonborn. Tyvia attempts to charm the charming. Asking the stone nymph’s name, to give Lorca the name of the writer, the nymph responds, “Do you think he is seeing another Paedramora?” With persuasion, Tyvia convinces the nymph that she’ll go with Aric to deliver the letter, to ensure its safe delivery… Unless Thava and Lugosh are released from their binds so Tyvia may keep her plans in Grillo with them. After some back and forth, she releases Thava. Stone nymph finally lets loose her name, Marqueza Nalda.


(Thava fell and hit a rock)

Aric helps Thava to her feet. She’s woozy. He reminds us that we have a stone note to deliver. We all bow, doff our various hats, and whatnot, and take our leave, only realizing when we’re about to leave that Lugash is still up in the tree of stone. We try to get the stone nymph to allow us to speak with Lugash, and she agrees in her own way: whatever noise he makes dictates whether he goes or stays. He makes a pitiful and angry noise, and she decides it means he wants to stay. We are unsure about this. Illy is now climbing around in the tree, and ends up hanging upside-down like an acrobat.

We try to convince the stone nymph to allow us to bring Lugash along with us. Rando attempts to make a deal with the nymph. Tyvia gently suggests that Rando not shake hands without first figuring out the terms of the deal. The nymph says Lugash could come with the party, however he would need to swear to return and that Rando would owe her a favor. Illy nearly falls from the tree above, smearing blood as she cuts herself on a broken branch, but now we all know she’s above us.

The nymph is particularly interested in a rouge from Rando’s disguise kit, especially after it’s applied to Tyvia’s already beautiful face. Aric makes the suggestion that Rando simply trade the rouge for Lugash, however, the nymph snaps to attention and tries to confuse Aric, but he sees through the charm. The deal is struck, Lugash drops and rolls to the rocks below. We hear a cat meow. Illy is still up in the tree, and annoyed by making all her efforts come to naught. She drops down like a jaguar.

Stone nymph whispers to Lugash, and he swears to come back by the next moon rise. We get upset about this, however since Rando and Yossarian are still charmed, they are useless in the dealings. The business is concluded, more or less.

The party heads back down the trail, but there’s no light and no easy way to discover the way they came from. Nobody is quite sure. Yossarian inspects the drift globe that the fae had left behind. Yossarian casts the light out and it floats along. Nobody seems to know what direction we’re supposed to be going, however, and it’s not going well. One dead squirrel is floating behind us, thanks to Lugosh.

The light illuminates our old friend, the goblin, who is standing inside the stone door of the building we’d originally come from. He tells us that we shouldn’t come back in here, as we promised not to come back. Illy raises her bow and fires a shot at the retreating goblin. Rando attempts to charm Illy into not shooting, but she resists it and fires anyway. Her arrow is true and finds purchase in the goblin. She runs forward to check her quarry. He used to be an adventurer, but then he took an arrow to the knee.

Tyvia attempts to heal the goblin, tying a tourniquet and pulling the arrow through, stabilizing the wound. Illy says the goblin was being a jerk, while Aric searches through the goblin’s pockets. Illy believes that we have safe passage if we have this goblin. According to Tyvia “He’s the best hall pass we’ve got.” Aric picks up the goblin gently and we continue on, trying to get out of this place. The ladies lead with their dark vision, followed by Yossarian and his drift globe and Rando and Aric close behind. We return to the area with the carvings, hoping to find our way out safely…

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